Pause

Fun is Emotional Self Care

Sheri here,

What is emotional self care?  Why is fun important?

Nurturing our Emotions 

Nurturing our emotions requires becoming aware of them, then leaning into the feelings in a way that honors you and the emotion.  If you deny or ignore them, they will find a way to come out: anger, depression, stress, anxiety, or worse.*

I have found I need to feel the feelings and sometimes that is one of the “ugh, oh no – not that” moments. Set with the feelings, breath, and allow them to exist. Creativity and play somewhat offset any negativity – fun times are always helpful to make those strong feeling times easier.

I’ve spent several challenging years surrounded by negativity and sheltering in place as many of you have.  Small wonder we struggle with emotional self care.  Those of you who have been following me for any period of time know that I’ve had floods in the house, construction and illness in the family, that have challenged my sense of wellbeing.

Between feeling the feelings, a daily gratitude list – at least three things I’m grateful for, fun activities, and time dedicated to my spiritual program, I’ve regained my equilibrium.

While nurturing our whole self is important, one of the things I forget is to play, have fun, or take it easy. But I struggle trying to figure out what fun looks like sometimes.

Adult Fun for Emotional Self Care

I don’t know about you, but every now and again I need to be reminded to have fun and what it looks like.  Sometimes I have to make a list of what’s fun – joyful.  To be able to feel  happiness,  lightness, positivity, and laughter bubble up is like watching my four grandchildren play with the abandon of a child.

Then how does that translate into adult fun?  So here is the list I was recently brainstorming – which are your favorites or what is forgotten?? Hit reply and let me know.  While you are at it, tell me what’s on your fun list for the day?

  • Be creative
  • Write a story or a poem
  • Play cards or board games
  • Read a book
  • Take a walk in nature or local park
  • Write a gratitude list
  • Do some coloring
  • Draw or sketch
  • Take photographs
  • Spend time on Pinterest
  • Listen to music
  • Dance with abandon
  • Watch a funny movie
  • Engage in sports
  • Try some thing new like a recipe or a masterclass
  • Exercise, if its fun
  • Spend time with a hobby
  • Take up a new hobby
  • Knit or crochet or sew
  • Talk with a fun friend – a fun buddy
  • Read some jokes and laugh out load

While you are focusing on fun, minimize the negativity by setting boundaries. limiting the news, or deliberately choosing how to respond to situations.

Choose a focus on playful things and mentally avoid the situations that deliberately cause you pain.  Feel the feelings, but don’t go looking for them.

Nurture yourself and bring along a fun friend!

Honor those positive feelings, minimizing exposure, as much as possible to negativity.  This is self care at its finest – what’s on your list for fun today?

Around Town Here

I’ve opened a wait list for progress notifications on my book, Everything I Learned About Life I Learned on Vacation, is currently still in reviewer comment mode on its publication path. You can sign-up for the wait list here.

May you have a blessed, fun-filled week.

‘til the next time.

Ciao,

Sheri

*If you are suffering depression, anger or anxiety issues seek the appropriate help from a medical or mental health professional.

Summer is Time for Vacation

Sheri here,

It is summer, time for vacation!

Have you taken a vacation lately?

Did it involve travel?

Was it too wonderful for words?

Did you have fun and can’t wait to do it again?

As you may know, I recently went on vacation and retreat to Vancouver Island and it was fabulous – refreshing, relaxing and rejuvenating!  All the things I want from a vacation.  But traveling can be challenging.  While my flights weren’t cancelled, I did spend 5 hours waiting for connections.

Possibly, you haven’t had a vacation in a long time – do you remember that feeling of excitement and fun from a favorite vacation in the past?

Vacation is intended to be a break from the ordinary as a restful respite.  It may be a busy or active time without the stress of every day.

Some daily self-care routines may carry over into vacation – with more space for self-nurturing.

Staycations are Vacations, Too

You could have good reason, the cost of gas for one or the challenge of travel for another, that continues to keep you at home, but you can choose to take a “Staycation”.  A vacation where you stay at home and hang out the sign calling it VACATION.

How do you approach that?  Identify the characteristics of that vacation that you loved – do you like to go places, eat out, visit friends, play at the pool or the beach, go to a museum, take pictures or take a nap?

Whatever it is, you can create a staycation and do these same types of things! Plan it like any other vacation – choose the time and the activities, put the daily chores on the back burner and enjoy.

The Objective is Fun

For instance, if you love to eat out – choose to different places than usual. It doesn’t need to be expensive – the objective is FUN.

Look around your neighborhood or the area around home and see what fun things there are to do that you haven’t visited in awhile or ever.

Be the tourist in your hometown, enjoy the small local historical museum, the walk through the nearby park with a picnic lunch at the end.

Maybe your community is like mine and is doing Concerts in the Park – GO! Make it different, make it fun.

Who knows, maybe it’s playing a favorite board game with the family and friends for the first time in a long time, a laughter filled time.

Possibly, you’ll discover something you make a part of your regular life because it is close. You’ll get that sense of freedom and relaxation that vacation brings on a mini basis.

A couple of my favorite things are a nap in the afternoon or time with a trashy novel – a complete escape from the everyday ordinary.

A staycation is your opportunity to identify what marks a meaningful break for you – you are relaxed, joyful and you recapture that connection with the things that are important.

My Book Status

In the past, I promised to keep you posted on what I’m up to around town:

The other big news I have is about my book, Everything I Learned About Life I Learned on Vacation. I have opened a wait list for publication notifications.  You can sign-up for the wait list.

May you have a blessed, fun-filled week.

‘til the next time.

Ciao,

Sheri

Take Your Own Advice – Walk Your Talk

Sheri here,

Taking your own advice and walking your talk is important.  In my last blog, I chatted about  sharpen our skills and said I was planning to take my own advice. (See “Sharpen Our Saw – Sharpen Our Skills”).

Saw Sharpening Skill Break

Last week, I attended a five-day writing retreat on Vancouver Island, British Columbia, Canada.  The setting was lovely with lots of green, flowers, and even a little rain – a real treat for this Southern California gal.  A perfect environment for doing serious writing.

The retreat itself was equally wonderful – we focused on manuscript techniques, editing skills – including getting feedback – and powerfully reading our writing live.  Each one of these can be intimidating, but in a safe environment, like this retreat, the practice opportunity is invaluable.

I learned a lot and saw a change in the depth of my writing skills. I was able to be more vulnerable as I wrote.  I got closer in my writing to the authentic me.  Being more able to talk about what I loved, hated and was indifferent about in life and me.  Now my challenge is to expand it to my business and those I serve.

I came home energized and relaxed, demonstrating, again, that a break from the everyday routine of life is important.

This time away allowed me to sharpen my saw, sharpen my skills on several levels: mentally, socially, emotional, spiritually, and in my writing.  It doesn’t matter if writing is important to you or not, but what does matter is the importance of periodically taking a break.

When is your next break to sharpen your skills?  Don’t have one planned yet?  Take a few minutes today and consider what skills training would benefit you the most – whether it is writing, sales training or meditation, give yourself the gift of pause and refresh you.

Need some help deciding what your next step is, give me a call here and we can work it together!

My New Book

I had the opportunity to read to my peers, sections of my soon to be published book: Everything I Learned About Life I Learned on Vacation – practice for my book promotions.  This is a compilation of my travel stories and life lessons I’ve learned on the road.

The other major item that happened this week was I chose the cover art for the book and I’m waiting for the designer’s samples – this is getting real!

While the publication date is still several months off, if you want to be on the wait list for notifications about the pre-orders for the book, leave a comment and let me know – I’ll add you to the list.

‘til the next time.

Ciao,

Sheri

Sharpen Your Saw

Sharpen Your Saw, Sharpen Your Skills

Sheri here,
Today I have a story for you – a fable. As with most fables there is a message in it!

The Woodcutters

There were two woodcutters – an older one, Stan who was weathered and experienced in the ways of chopping wood; and Jack, a younger woodcutter who was brawny and new on the job.

They had a friendly running battle about who could chop the most wood, and they decided one day to have a contest to prove it, once and for all.

The day of the contest came and they both started; but soon, Jack heard Stan quit for a bit and thought, oh yes, I’ve got this. Stan came back to work and busily cut wood, then he stopped again.

This went on all day. Jack was certain he had won, he had never stopped and Stan kept stopping and started. But Jack was astonished when he realized that Stan had beat him by a sizeable margin.

He asked Stan, “How did you do that, you kept stopping?” Stan said: “When I stopped, I was sharpening my saw, so I was always cutting with a sharp saw”.

Pause and Sharpen our Skills

What is the morale here? We need to continually sharpen our saw – our saw is our skills, whether they are physical, mental, social or spiritual.

It is important to pause, as my blog “The Power of the Pause”, mentions AND it is important during some of those pauses to also sharpen the saw – sharpen your skills.

Those skills can be learning some new computer, app, tips, and tricks or spending time in conversation with your High Power seeking an expanded awareness or attending a formal class of interest to you.

Next week, I’m going to be going to a Writing Retreat with my writing coach, Marie Maccagno, “Adventures in Writing” to sharpen my writing skills. As you may know, I’ve been working on a book: Everything I Learned About Life I Learned on Vacation, due to be published Fall 2022. During this journey, I’ve learned a lot, including new skills.

I’m looking forward to getting away from the everyday and focusing on new learning!

What about you? What are you doing to sharpen your skills? Need some help in focusing on what to do next? Maybe you don’t believe you can afford the time or money to sharpen your skills – let’s talk! Call me here and we’ll figure it out together.

‘til the next time.

Ciao,

Sheri

P.S. Sharpening you Skills can be daunting; but it is also very exciting.  If you are a bit tentative about why you need to keep learning, schedule a call with me here. and I’ll help you with the why!

The Power of the Pause

Sheri Here –

Sometimes you need to stop!  There is power in the pause.

Depending upon the situation, that pause can be 5 minutes, 5 hours, 5 days, or 5 weeks.

Our world of instant communication can work for me or against me.

Stopping to collect my wits when I’m in a sticky spot, before I hit send is frequently a good idea.

If I pause, stop, and take a deep breath or two before I proceed, I might create no additional upset.

If I reconsider the note or text I was going to send and ask myself, is it the appropriate thing to be said, to be said by me, to be said by me now – I frequently prevent bigger, longer-term issues.

Maybe I need to wait a little longer to hit send or never send at all.

What I often found is that after a pause, I would reframe the note, soften the language and be more productive in my answer.  Plus, avoid hurt feelings or need to do damage control, later.

HALT – Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired

HALT, an acronym for Hungry, Angry, Lonely or Tired – is a great reminder to STOP, halt, if you are any ONE of those things.  What my experience has been is poor decisions or actions follow, if I don’t take care of the underlying problem first.

In a situation, where I am hungry, angry, lonely, OR tired I can get real grumpy.  The next person I see is likely to get their head bitten off for no apparent reason.

I’ve had my husband George ask me a question, and my response be, “I think I need to eat before I answer.”  After I’ve eaten something nutritious – doesn’t have to be a huge meal, I’m more rational and will give him the answer that’s a reasonable response.

Longer Pause – Vacation

Other times, I need to take a longer break, a time away, a long weekend, or a vacation to completely disconnect.  After that I’m recharged and return with a new perspective on life – either you love it and feel blessed or you realize you need a change of some kind.

Not long ago, I visited my sister in Arizona, for a week.  When I left I was rushed and hassled by the small everyday stuff.

The drive in the open spaces crossing the desert from Los Angeles, was meditative.  Sleeping in, walks, a massage, and working on a couple of projects together was different than my day-to-day activities.  When I returned home, I was refreshed and ready to “Take the Next Indicated Step” – see my blog on the next indicated action here.  I experienced, the power of the pause!

How about you?  When was the last time you felt the power of the pause? Or HALTed? Or that you rewarded yourself with time away?  Maybe you don’t believe you can afford the time or money or that you deserve it – let’s talk!  Hit reply or call me here  and we’ll figure it out.

There is a solution for a break for everyone.  Let’s discover it together.

‘til the next time.

Ciao,

Sheri

P.S. Hitting the pause button sometimes takes courage.  If you need a compassionate ear with possible solutions, schedule a call with me here.

Asking for Help

Ask for What? Help!!

Sheri here –

Have you ever discovered that you had a splinter in your finger, and you have no recollection of when or how it happened? Worse, you can’t see it well enough to remove it?

When did our vision, our eyesight change?

The last time I tried to use a needle and thread, I was getting ready to leave my hotel room on the way to a meeting and I looked down and saw a ripped seam in a very visible spot.

All I had was a little hotel sewing kit. You may know the one, the one with a few strands of basic colored threaded and a needle, maybe a button and a tiny safety pin. The eyes of the needle is one of the teeny tiny ones. The ones that used to be easy to thread; but now, that bloody thread wasn’t going into that little hole.

At home, I have needles with big eyes or ask for help in repairing it; but in my hotel ready to walk out – a different story.

I Remember I Used to Laugh

I remember, I used to laugh at my quirky Aunt Lorene, who I just adored, and the stuff that she would do.  She couldn’t see something; realize she needed her glasses and then she would wander all over the house looking for her glasses, only to discover they were on the top of her head.

I’d giggle and then she would turn to me and give me that look – you know that look the “just wait, your turn is coming”.  With the arrogance of youth, I thought “no way, never gonna happen to me!”

But here I am, trying to thread that needle, looking for my glasses or my car keys or my cell phone.

I had become my quirky Aunt chasing my glasses, my car keys, my cell phone.

When does our vision change?  Is it the same time our perspective on life changes? 

Do you relate to any of this?

What Do We Do?

What do we do? Fight it, refuse to believe it, accept it, or, wait for it, ask for help – are you kidding? That doesn’t seem right, well, not yet!

Sometimes the solution is surrender. Pause, stop for a moment, take a deep breath, maybe ask the Universe, God, or your Higher Power for help.

The Universe, God, or your Higher Power ALWAYS answer. Maybe not the one you want, and it is frequently one of the following: Yes, no or not now (darn!!)

A solution arrives, many times in an unexpected manner, other times, hitting the pause button is all that was needed. Those keys or phone or glasses show up.

That needle in the hotel, persistence worked – the pause gave me a new perspective.

In that moment of surrender, when we just throw up our hands and say what the heck, there seems to be just enough room for a change in our thinking, our perspective, our point of view.

Maybe the change in perspective is asking for help.

Does any of this sound familiar?

Keep More Money in Your Pocket

So, while I go looking for the tweezers with the magnifier attached for my splinter, here are a couple changes of perspective for keeping more money in your pocket.

  • Consider becoming a distributor for your favorite cosmetics, skin and hair care. Get it wholesale!
  • Look at the coupons in your drug store to see if you can save on items that you use regularly.
  • Avoid online shopping when you’re in a “retail therapy” trying-to-fill-a-hole-mode. Maybe talk to a friend instead.
  • Buy a classic coat and sweater style in basic colors or your favorite color that you can use season after season. Splurge on a beautiful scarf and change the look.
  • Call your cable TV or satellite provider and see if you can get a cheaper rate – tell them you’re also looking at their competitor (of course if there is no competition, just asking for options might help).

Drop a comment below and let me know how these tips are working for you and how I can help!

Ciao,
Sheri
P.S. If you’d like immediate access to my free ebook with “101 Ways to Save Money”, click here to download!

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